Private quiz show: Paris Hilton versus Eric Prince.
Hugh: Okay, Eric, your starter for five poins: pleae read the word on the card with the correct foreign pronunciation.
[Disappointingly, the founder and CEO of Velociraptor Global does an effortless take-down of the challenge word: VERSACE. From this one deduces that he has been shopping with Paris at least once, and one wonders what pretty things she chose do dress him up in.]
Hugh: Okay, Paris, here is the globe the Material Girl recommdended you buy. A steal at a cool $750,000.
The globe, which used to belong to one A. Hitler, was found in the course of the recent excavations associated with the removal of Lenin'w body from Red Square.
Paris: (uncertainly) This is like, uh, thingy...? Planet Earth?
Hugh: Right, Mrs President, correct. It is indeed Thingy. Now, how can we get to Thingy from where we presently are?
There is a long and somewhat sullen silence until Paris, after bludging another hit of cocaine from Hugh - with this girl you definitely need to have your incentive scheme in place - finally surfaces an answer.
"It's a trick question, isn't it, you ratbag? We're on Thingy alredy, aren't we?
Hugh concedes that this is so, but refuses to let Paris have any more nose candy. He also reminds Paris of two things:
1. This time he brought hi s Taser along;
2. He does NOT like being called "ratbag."
In revenge for the ratbag comment, Hugh challenges Paris to find Africa on the globe.
After a LONG pause, something suddenly clicks, and Paris fingers, in rapid succession, Australia, Brazil, Alaska and Antarctica.
Hugh sighs, and reaches for two things. One is the pack of brand ID cards ... guess the logo from the small visible fragment ...and the other is a similar pack featuring foods which have too many calories to eat.
"Okay," he says, "let's continue."
If you can teach elementary school in Japan you can teach anything ... right?
The bad point about being junior life coach is that he gets paid less than a tenth of what Madonna is raking in. The good point is that he is not, as a rule,required to spend very much time one on one with Paris.
Hugh notes that Eric I still fooling with the Glock which he (perhaps unthinkingly) pulled out after Hugh made his (in rerospect, regrettablea) Taser remark.
This is going to be, Hugh thinks, yes, another of those long nights.